***pregnancy mentioned***
My name was on the marquee! It was up there in lights!
Alright, that's exaggerating a bit- well a lot- but that is what it felt like. The other night I received an evite to my very own baby shower. I can't help myself from looking at it a couple of times a day. I just keep thinking, "Wow, that's me... the invitation is talking about me. Me and my baby." Sounds weird to say that about an invitation and not the act of registering.
There are still times when I wonder if I am really going to have this baby. You know like, "Are we really going to get a dog?" or "Are we really going to backpack across Europe?" These are things that you talk about but do they really happen?
I have to say overall it really does look like we will have a baby come May. Then doubt and worry start to kick in. I have been worried lately that maybe we shouldn't have stopped the IVIg treatments. Despite Lil' P seeming to move more than ever and she (remember I use "he" ans "she" interchangeably!) woke me up several times last night. I know that it's all just fear but it still all seems so surreal to me. So surely the rug will be pulled out form under me if my expectations are too high.
As for the other part of my life that isn't nearly as surreal- figuring out how we are going to make things work financially once the baby is here. Things are tight right now and since my work is really, really slow things just got a lot tighter. What are we going to do when this happens and the baby is here??? I am trying to remind myself that there is still plenty of time to figure it out and make adjustments. Perhaps my new mantra should be "God would not give us anything that we couldn't handle" as this is the phrase I have been repeating to myself these past two weeks.
Ugh, if only I could have won the lottery two nights ago. That would have made everything surreal- in a good way.
Monday, February 25, 2008
Friday, February 22, 2008
Been MIA
Sorry I have been MIA- my computer got sick and is still being worked on so internet access is limited for me!
I am hoping to catch up with everyone by the end of next week! Hope all is well :)
I am hoping to catch up with everyone by the end of next week! Hope all is well :)
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
One Eww and $7.00 Later
So you ever try something new only to be completely disappointed?
That's what happened to me today. I went to Star.bucks wanting a Decaf Mocha Frapp.uccino. However, since they never ever sell them you have to wait 15 minutes to get one. Last time I was in they suggested an iced Cafe Mocha. I declined that day because who wants to be disappointed? So I got my traditional Cafe Mocha instead (it was chilly outside that day.)
No matter the weather conditions lately a frappuccino just sounds tastier. However, it also has caffine in it so I prefer getting the decaf. So this leaves me in a bind of sorts.
Well, today I went in and ordered an decaf Iced Mocha (I threw caution to the wind). Can you say, "Eww!"? Why would this replace a decaf Mocha Frappucinno???? I took one sip while walking down the sidewalk and said "Ewww...". I then took another one just to make sure and said, "Yup, still sick" and threw it away. Then had to go to a different Starbuck's across town because I couldn't walk back into the other one and order another drink (I was too embarrassed) and I had a nasty taste in my mouth.
To throwing caution to the wind... I say, "Screw you!"
That's what happened to me today. I went to Star.bucks wanting a Decaf Mocha Frapp.uccino. However, since they never ever sell them you have to wait 15 minutes to get one. Last time I was in they suggested an iced Cafe Mocha. I declined that day because who wants to be disappointed? So I got my traditional Cafe Mocha instead (it was chilly outside that day.)
No matter the weather conditions lately a frappuccino just sounds tastier. However, it also has caffine in it so I prefer getting the decaf. So this leaves me in a bind of sorts.
Well, today I went in and ordered an decaf Iced Mocha (I threw caution to the wind). Can you say, "Eww!"? Why would this replace a decaf Mocha Frappucinno???? I took one sip while walking down the sidewalk and said "Ewww...". I then took another one just to make sure and said, "Yup, still sick" and threw it away. Then had to go to a different Starbuck's across town because I couldn't walk back into the other one and order another drink (I was too embarrassed) and I had a nasty taste in my mouth.
To throwing caution to the wind... I say, "Screw you!"
Friday, February 08, 2008
Wish
Some days I wish I were my dog. He just seems so carefree and happy. If I were my dog, people could just let outside to play on a nice day. Then I would investgate the outside by sniffing around and I would take a little snooze in sun on the back porch to rest my poor tired paws.
To top off my day, I would have a nice leisurely walk outside, only to come home to someone else who would give me a nice scratch and be given a tasty treat.
I wish I were my dog.
Monday, February 04, 2008
Huh
***pregnancy mentioned***
It was a nice afternoon, about 60 degrees outside so there was no need for a jacket.
As I was walking into Moe's for lunch (I got the Ruprict incase you are wondering) I opened the door and, quite suddenly, me and my belly felt very exposed... very vunerable. I tried to put my hand over my growing belly to try and conceal it (but that was like trying to cover up the huge pimple that was in the middle of my forehead before the 8th grade dance- impossible).
I think that it's odd that I still feel anxious when others might realize I am pregnant and ask questions. That there are still times, even at 27 weeks, when I still feel the need and urge to hide my pregnancy.
It was a nice afternoon, about 60 degrees outside so there was no need for a jacket.
As I was walking into Moe's for lunch (I got the Ruprict incase you are wondering) I opened the door and, quite suddenly, me and my belly felt very exposed... very vunerable. I tried to put my hand over my growing belly to try and conceal it (but that was like trying to cover up the huge pimple that was in the middle of my forehead before the 8th grade dance- impossible).
I think that it's odd that I still feel anxious when others might realize I am pregnant and ask questions. That there are still times, even at 27 weeks, when I still feel the need and urge to hide my pregnancy.
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